To Owen turning two

Tonight is the last night you will ever by my one year old. 

Every night, before bath, you sit (and pee) on your potty chair, then pull out the pot, dump it in the toilet, flush the toilet, close the lid, and put the pot back in the potty chair. Each time you ask me to pee on the toilet at the same time as you. So we sit directly across from each other as the bath water runs. The look of surprise on your face when you feel yourself start to pee is priceless. 

Lately, after you and Liza take your bath, Daddy has been putting you to bed while I nurse Liza to sleep. Tonight was different. I asked Daddy to please not put you to bed until I was done with Liza. Liza fell asleep quickly, as if she knew I needed that from her tonight. When I came into your room, you and Daddy were lining up your cars. You asked me to read a book to you. "Toolbox." It's one of your favorites. I sat down on the floor and you sat in front of me. I asked if you wanted to sit in my lap and you responded, "I sit down." And my heart proceeded to break. You are becoming so independent. You always have been, really, but even more so lately. 

When I finished the book and told you it was time to say prayers, you frantically began pointing out all the other books you wanted me to read. I stuck to my guns and told you we could read all those books tomorrow and, on the verge of tears, you responded, "Ahwww!" I often have a hard time holding back my smiles in moments like that. It's not that I'm happy about your being upset, of course. It's that you're so darn adorable.

I picked you up as Daddy turned off the lights and put holy water in your font. We all blessed ourselves and began saying our prayers and for the first time ever, tonight, you started saying them along with us. You weren't saying all the words, but it was clear that you were trying to follow along. I opened my eyes to look and there you were, eyes squinted, mumbling the words "Soul to keep."

When prayers were done we asked who you wanted to sing songs to you. "Mommy sing songs. Hold you." So I did. I held you tight as I sang "Rockabye Baby" and all the other songs you requested. I finally kissed you and blessed you and lay you in your crib before leaving your room.

Usually you go right to sleep, but tonight, as I was wrapping your birthday presents in my room, I heard you screaming out. I went in to see what was wrong and you told me "Airplane. Drop it downnare." The toy airplane you were sleeping with had fallen through the crib. I picked it up and gave back to you and you quickly asked that I sing "Bumblebee." I did and you covered your face with your pillow pet and that was that. That was my last moment with you as a one year old. A moment I will always cherish.

Big things are planned for tomorrow. Daddy is going to stop on his way home (he is currently on the morning shift and you like to tell me "Daddy work ALLLLL night.") to pick up a birthday doughnut for you. Then Nana is going to watch Liza while I take you to the mall for lunch and to finally ride the train. You are so into trains right now. That was the theme for your birthday party last Saturday.

Sometimes, like right now, I imagen you as a teenager and it makes my cry. Not because I don't want you to grow up; I do! I am excited for the relationship I think I'll have with teenage you. I cry because time is just to fast and life is just too busy and thinking ahead makes me remember the past. I can't help but cry because I will never get to hold one year old Owen again. 

I love you, Owen Beau Vegter. I hope you always feel that. I hope you never doubt that. You are such an incredible little boy and it is my joy to spend every day with you. 

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I'm back

It's been about a year since I regularly spent time on this blog.
A lot changes in a year.

I have thoroughly enjoyed this past year. A year full of life and death; happiness and sorrow. It was a year I will always remember.  So many new members to our over-sized family in the form of sister-in-laws and nieces and of course my sweet daughter.
And the loss of my dear Nana.

It has been a year of growth and change. Learning to adapt to the different seasons of life. The seasons that seem to change with month, sometimes with the day. The hour even. More than anything I feel it has been a year of discovering purpose. My purpose as wife and mother to the family I have been blessed with. I won't lie- this job is hard. Some days, it's painstakingly difficult. But it also beautiful and rewarding and I wouldn't trade it for all the tea in China.

All this to say, I think I'd like to come back here. Wherever "here" is now. Lately I have felt this pull, an urge to write. To document.
Because I am forever growing. We all are, really.

Especially these two.

Won't you slow down, please? For the sake of your Momma's heart.

Birth Announcement

... just a little late.

Elizabeth Katheen Vegter

' Liza Kate '

Born November 4th @ 6:51pm

7lbs 9oz  19 3/4in

Owen's first haircut (and a photo dump)

Yesterday I decided, after one too many strangers telling me how "pretty" Owen was, that it was time to suck it up and give my precious babe is first haircut. I did not nearly enough research googling "how to cut a toddler's hair" before deciding that I was ready to take on the task. 

Stick toddler in highchair, distract him with a treat, snip away; Seems easy enough, right? So, so, wrong!

The cookie we gave him lasted all of 25 seconds before he had devoured it and the lollipop that followed did slightly better at about 4 min. The thing is, neither of those things helps in keeping the little toddler head still and turned in the direction needed so that you don't cut all lopsided like. And there's a slight issue with the highchair method considering that the back of the chair is about an inch higher than Owen's head. So we moved to daddy's lap and a vice grip while coaxing "Oooowen! Look at Daddy!" "Look at MOMmy" "Look! Look! Outside!"

Despite all that it was a moment I'll always remember. And I may or may not have been blinking back tears as I chopped away the little curls on the back of his head. The same thin strands of hair that were the first parts of him to make an entrance into this world. And yes, after sweeping up the floor and washing the stray hairs off Owen's back, I did tie two of those tiny curls with string and tuck them away in his baby book so that someday, when he's a big strong man, I can pull out those curls and remember the precious little head they used to reside on. And now my little baby doesn't look so much like a baby anymore, but more like a little boy. Like the big brother he is about to become. It breaks my heart just a little, but mostly just makes my heart sing.

*****

And now for a photo dump :)

A little update on the pregnancy: I am officially 35 weeks as of today. Only two more progesterone injections left and I'll be full term. I feel so blessed to have made it this far in this pregnancy and feel confident that Liza will be born healthy at full term (maybe even late!) 

Thank you to everyone who has been praying for us. I feel your prayers and appreciate them so much!

We moved! (and a lot of other stuff happened too)

My blog has gone on a bit of a hiatus because, well, life got busy. We moved into our new home and graduated from "first-time home buyers" to "first-time home owners." That still blows my mind. HOMEOWNERS! I'm sure it will hit me hard in the face when that first mortgage payment comes out of the bank account next week. But I will happily eat peanut butter and rice and beans for a year to be able to come home to a place that is ours. 

Continuing with the broke homeowners theme: we do not currently have cable or internet. Thus, I have no way of blogging. That's my excuse. But to be quite honest, life has been so busy lately that I don't think I'd be doing much blogging even if we did.

Owen is doing all kinds of growing and developing and I am really enjoying just enjoying it. He knows about 5 signs (please, milk, more, all done, water) and picks up the new ones I teach him in a matter of hours. He says "ball" for balls and baloons and anything round. He says "broom-broom" for vehicles, anything with wheels, and anything that makes a loud noise. He says "nana" for his Nana and bananas and every other food. He finally says "mama," even if he's normally pointing at something that has nothing to do with me when he says it. I'll still take it. His favorite thing to do his to be held while he points at everything in sight saying "this. that. this. thiiiiis." It's adorable.

He still isn't walking. He has callouses on his knees from all the crawling he does, but he does spend a lot of time lately walking behind all his push toys, and chairs, and anything else he's strong enough to move.

He has quite the voice and he likes to make himself heard. Most of his screeching is out of delight, but still, it's screeching. ugh. He's a naught little goose, too. Before he does something he knows is wrong, he looks back at me and gets this devilish grin on his face. I have to try really hard not to laugh most of the time. If does something to make mommy say "NO!" he thinks its hilarious. Like he falls over cracking up laughing. We're gonna have to work on the whole discipline thing.

Beau was finally released onto active duty yesterday! The doctors are all shocked at how quickly he has recovered from his surgery. I'm not. He was so determined to get out on the streets that I knew he'd push himself to get there as fast as possible. So the 6 days on 3 days off changing shifts begins tomorrow. I must admit, it's pretty cool having a police car parked in the driveway! Like a built in security system. 

And a little brag on my man- he had to be re-qualified to carry a gun so he went up to the training center to shoot the course. The current academy was there doing firearms training, so he shot the course with them. They've been training for the past month or so and he hasn't shot in about 3 months. He blew them out of the water! He got the highest score, by far! 

And now an update on Liza and myself. A lot has gone on since my last post. Four days after I was put on bed rest I had a pre scheduled appt with the perinatologist, because Liza had a marker for Down Syndrome. At my 20wk ultrasound they couldn't find her nasal bone. They had me come back a week later and they still couldn't see it. Because this can be a marker for DS, they sent me to the perinatologist (high-risk pregnancy doctor) at 24wks. She had another ultrasound done and still didn't see a nasal bone. She recommended that I have the Harmony blood test which is 99% accurate at detecting DS during pregnancy. She also switched me from Procardia to Indocin for my contractions and recommended that I start recieving weekly 17P progesterone injections. I had my first injection and a few days later was back in L&D with contractions 2 minutes apart. They gave me Procardia and three shots of Terbutaline, the contractions stopped and I went home. On 7/31 my mom went with me to see the genetic counselor and have my blood drawn. The weekly P17 injections continued and on 8/5 I had my first contraction free day! On 8/14 the results came back and we discovered that Liza is not at risk for DS. By that point we had both come to terms with the idea that she might have an extra chromosome. We were well aware of the equal amounts of blessings Liza would bring to our family with or without DS.

At this point in my pregnancy I don't have much to complain about. Since the contractions stopped I have developed SPD which causes intense pelvic/hip pain. Rolling in bed, getting out of bed, climbing stairs, etc. is almost unbearable. But I would much rather have this pain than the risk of Liza being born too soon, or, God forbid, not making it. Other than that it's just your typical pregnancy symptoms- constantly having to pee, indigestion, sciatica and so forth. 

So there it is. My little update on our busy life. 

I'm a little better about keeping up with instagram, so if you're not already, go follow me there @vegters3

Expect an overload of cuteness by way of #Owengram pictures :)

Bed rest.

As of Monday night, I have been put on bed rest for "at least two weeks." 

After a quick trip to the park, where I sat in the shade and watched on as Beau chased Owen up and down the playground, and grocery store I started getting contractions. These weren't the random tightening ones I had been getting on Saturday and Sunday. These were crampy, achy, and coming every 15 min or sooner. What really worried me was that these felt like the contractions I had the morning Owen was born. 

I finally decided to call the nurse to see what her advice would be. After paging the Dr. and three more contractions, she told me to head over L&D to be evaluated. I had a few more contractions on the way over and after checking my vitals and hearing the baby's heart beat, the nurse asked me to let her know when I was having another contraction. I did and when she checked the monitor it turned out that I had one before that I hadn't noticed.

They started me right away on an iv of fluids, even though I had been staying very hydrated. The Dr came in and did an extremely uncomfortable pelvic exam to check my cervix and swab to test for fetal fibronectin. Thankfully, my cervix was closed and an ultrasound showed that there isn't any thinning yet. The iv didn't slow the contractions, so they gave me two shots of terbutaline which did end up stopping them. Before deciding to let me go home, the Dr told me that the results of the fFN test came back positive. This doesn't necessarily mean that I will give birth preterm, but along with the fact that Owen was born preterm it increases the chances to above 60%. 

The Dr. sent me home with a prescription for procardia to try to keep the contractions from starting back up and orders for bed rest. So far the contractions have continued, but at a much less regular rate. I have an ultrasound scheduled for Friday morning and a check-up on Monday. I'm just praying hard that Liza stays right where she is for at least 15 more weeks.